Scary! Things weren't exactly going to well as it was. But do I really believe...? Thirteen is actually regarded as lucky in Wicca! I'm still not entirely okay about the number, but I don't worry as much about that now. But I still worry about Friday 13...
But I did just see the most amazing crow in the trees, from the kitchen window - so big and beautiful. He looked straight at me. I miss the wild crows and jackdaws at Marwell Zoo. Colin and I used to be annual members and go there on a regular basis - as well as Birdworld and, at one point, Blue Reef Aquarium.
I haven't left the flat since the start of November. I went around to try to collect a parcel of ours from the next-door neighbours (who weren't in by then, and one of them brought it over later.) It was my Netbook - my birthday present - which is how I know that we're talking about the start of November!!! Days, weeks, months merge into one another, and life drifts on. I don't want to bore anyone with details of my specific physical or mental health symptoms, though - serves no purpose. Before that, I went to the dentist - felt that I couldn't cancel for what would have been the third time. And before that, it was the hairdressers...Guess my hair looked good for the dentist and his wife, then!!! I know that I really do need to break the cycle, but each time that I'm nearly there psychologically, my body "chucks out" the most awful symptoms. I am going crazy, though. But I don't know how I will deal with social situations, either. I wasn't exactly coping, in that respect, before. I am terrified of telephones. I don't currently talk to anyone apart from Colin - except for online. If it wasn't for the internet, I would be completely isolated, and I am so grateful for our computers. It isn't an ideal situation, but at least I have some contact with the outside world.
Right, I'll shut up now! Love and peace to you all. xxx
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